Posted by: Terri Johnston Fraracci | September 26, 2010

Who am I?

While praying this morning I asked God “Who am I?”.  The response of “Does it matter?” shocked me. “What do you mean? Of course it matters. Everybody needs to know who they are!” The response to that statement was silence. Okay. He’s God. He gets to do that.

So I continued to pray for those who have requested prayer, those who are heavy on my heart, and of course, the people in my life who I love. That’s when it hit me. That’s when I understood, “Does it matter?”.

It’s not that it doesn’t matter. It does. The real question was does spending time pondering who I am matter more than the task at hand (in this case, intercession)? Will any more be revealed to me if I continue to think, wonder, try to figure it out? The answer to that is a resounding no. What goes on in my head will not tell me who I am. What goes on in my head is the same as what I say; it means nothing without action.

If I want to know who I am, I simply need to observe what I do every day. How do I treat people? How do I love? What are my priorities? What do I spend most of my time and energy on? Do my actions match my words? Who I am is already as plain as day, for who I am is manifested in what I do.

Does trying to figure out who you are matter more than what you do? No. It is, in fact, a subtle ruse that will keep you from knowing. All you need to do to know who you are is to see what you do. Nothing is more eye-opening than your daily behavior – when with others and when alone.

Wondering who you are today? Watch how your day unfolds, what you deem important, how you act, and how you respond to others. You will know who you are beyond a shadow of a doubt as evidenced by what you do. And you will realize that either who you really are is pretty good, or you will be able to see more clearly what needs to be done to become who you want to be.

I love it when God answers my question by not answering my question; which ends up being the answer to my question.  He’s God. He gets to do that :).

Will I find out who I am just by thinking about it?

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Responses

  1. As you know, I think about this. The ‘identity’ lost from leaving my career (that defined me so I thought) and staying at home left me lost as to an identity.

    Interestingly enough or ironically enough, today I realized that my role, who I am has been defined for me. Or, who I am today has been a metamorphosis of much, but mainly my kids. All of J’s diagnosis have helped me find that I am his warrior, his puzzle fixer. Crusader, advocate, student. I raise my kids, I try to touch others….I watched what I was doing, saying and realized…who I am.

    Like

    • Gina: “I watched what I was doing, saying and realized…who I am.” – exactly! Thank you so much for your thoughtful comment :).

      Like


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